Thursday, December 08, 2005

Tactical Nuclear Strike in "War On Christmas"

Everybody with a blog these days has been throwing in with one side or another on the whole "War On Christmas" deal. Bill O'Reilly is firing away like Arnold at the end of "Commando" and everyone on the left is returning fire.

I've pretty much skipped past these posts on most blogs, and avoided wading into this mess here mostly because I think it's pretty dumb. This is an annual rite for idiots like O'Reilly. It has taken the place of the advent calendar for him. He uses his Bully Pulpit of Ignorant Outrage to flail wildly at anyone not wearing a Santa hat or lying in a manger.

Here's a clip of O'Reilly and his understudy, the truth and pigment-challenged John Gibson holding court on "Christmas Under Siege." These two braniacs go on to make the claim that, the "War" on Christmas part of "secular progressive agenda" that includes "legalization of narcotics, euthanasia, abortion at will, gay marriage and prostitution." It's the highest of comedy. And the fact that they are serious makes it even better. (Yes, they really did prepare the graphic on the right. And check the screen crawl—I couldn't Photoshop it any better.)

I finally came across a take-down post worthy of passing along. Did I mention this whole thing is dumb? Well, dumb is not good enough for O'Reilly—he is straight-up certifiable.
O'REILLY: [Laughs] There you go. Jon Stewart, "Secular Central." Oh, I'm sorry, Comedy Central -- and I like Stewart, but we know what he's doing over there.

Typical crap from him, but as Greg at The Talent Show points out...
What's funnier than O'Reilly's unfortunate attempts at humor, however, is that O'Reilly is targeting Jon Stewart. I hate to be the bearer of bad news, Bill, but Jon Stewart is a Jew and Jews don't celebrate Christmas. When you've sunk to the point that you're attacking non-Christians for not celebrating Christian holidays, your witchhunt has completely jumped the shark. I say you hang this one up and prepare for your next crusade. Here's a suggestion : Did you know that those anti-American bastards in Canada don't even celebrate the Fourth of July?! If we can stretch that one between May and July sweeps weeks, then we're good as gold.

[UPDATE: Stewart responds here.]

It's a shame Greg doesn't write more often, because when he does, he can be among the best there are. He goes on to expose the whole "War On Christmas" for what it really is...
The other day I was talking to my friend Josh about ways to destroy Christmas and he brought up an interesting point. The unending wave of inclusion and good-will that O'Reilly is attacking isn't the fault of secular progressivism, but good ol' fashioned capitalism. At some point, retailers noticed that the shameless orgy of consumption we experience between Thanksgiving and New Year's was only sucking in Christians. Rich Uncle Pennybags figured out that a simple semantic change from "Merry Christmas" to "Happy Holidays" (which, until recently, was considered a kind thing to say) would broaden the base of consumers to include the 20% or so of Americans that don't celebrate the pagan celebration that was turned into Jesus' birthday. It's not an attempt to diminish Christianity or make the country more inclusive, it's just an attempt to make more money.

It's so obvious I cannot believe no one has pointed it out before. Target isn't calling it a "Holiday Sale" because they hate Christmas, they do it because there are other holidays to sell things for. This isn't revolutionary stuff, yet I haven't seen anyone else use this argument so clearly against the Crudsading Religious Jackasses. Nicely done.

1 comment:

ORF said...

Nice post, MF!