The Year in Review Review

Because Mr. Furious can never get enough hatred and harsh judgement...

• Bill Maher compiles his "Dickheads of the Year" in a Rolling Stone photo-essay. Best line? "We had a pretty nice house when this Cat in the Hat of presidents came in and made the mess of all time"

• The Beast has a brilliant, hysterical and hard-hitting list of "The 50 Most Loathsome People in America, 2007"

• I only did six "Dick of the Week" posts this past year—and certainly not due to lack of Dicks—you can review them here and vote in the comments for who deserves the top spot.

More traditional "Best/Worst" and "Top 10"-style lists...

• Peter Travers' Best and Worst Movies of 2007 Of course, I haven't seen any of them (Best or Worst) but I want desperately to see every one of his "Best" picks except "Sweeney Todd" and "I'm Not There."

• Slate.com's Good Riddance 2007 includes the usually excellent Dahlia Lithwick with a disapppointing review of The Bush administration's dumbest legal arguments of the year."

• More of a "Before and After" or "I told you so," here are two columns from the incomparable Charles P. Pierce. The first, when he explains in September why "the enraged Patriots will go undefeated," and the second when he tells you "The Patriots are great. Deal with it." Even if you are sick to death of the Patriots, Pierce is one of the finest sports, political, or just plain writers around. Read.

I'll add more as I find them...

Perfect Season. So Far...

"We were the first ones to climb Mount Everest," Yepremian said late Saturday. "If New England comes and does it, then they can be the second ones. But you usually don't remember No. 2. I remember Sir Edmund Hillary was the first one to climb Mount Everest. I don't remember who did it the second time. Do you?"

Drink up Garo, Nick, Don and the rest of you bitter old fucks.

Ya know, even as a Patriots fan, I was all prepared to pen a "the Patriots haven't done anything until they win the Super Bowl" post, until I read that self-serving, sore loser crap "response". Since you bitter assclowns broke out champagne every time an undefeated team lost in Week 10 or 13 (or whenever) for the last thirty years, Garo, you don't get to play it like this now—you care and you watched. All of you. Your perfect regular season is history, and in a month 19-0 will make 17-0 look like you climbed Mount Wycheproof, douche.

What? I've been busy...

Sorry for letting the blog slide lately...been taking it easy and enjoying some quality family time this week and catching up on some freelance work and personal projects. When I've actually sat down at the computer, I've been doing other stuff and that's not even denting my (our) main objectives of the break (I get 7 workdays off, plus the weekends)—to get the freaking house in order. Here is some of shit on my list:

Finish designing fantasy sports covers.
Make countless revisions on fantasy sports covers.
Organize and update portfolio/resumé.
Clean my desk.
Clean the goddamn basement (which contains my desk).
Organize and upload photos on Flickr or something similar.
Install storm door.
Shrinkwrap windows.
Donate the old Furiousmobile.
Clean the gutters.
Set up Kid's ice rink.
Clean the goddamn basement.
Take down all the Christmas stuff/tree.
Fit in all the necessary holiday activities/obligations.
Enjoy my family.*
And, finally, clean the goddamn basement.

*No, I'm not done enjoying my family, but I have spent plenty of time on it. We've had some really great times this week...that project is ongoing...

It began to feel like the week off was slipping away without progress, so yesterday we kicked it into high gear and decided to tackle a major obstacle—what the fuck are we going to do with all this new Christmas shit when we can't even put away the stuff we already have? Every night I shove the shit back under the tree and it just creeps back out again like a tide...


So it's off to IKEA. We need serious storage upgrades for the playroom/den in order to make progress anywhere else in the house.

Here's where we started...no place to put the crap already IN the playroom, which means getting anything else put away is impossible. So the whole main floor gets contaminated and is just one big fucking toy box. And believe me, this "archive" photo is not giving you the full picture, but this is a pretty typical day in the playroom.

Three hundred bucks later, we have a totally revamped playroom, with storage for every toy in current circulation, and a theoretically functional place for the kids to play. That whole setup on the right is the new stuff. Of course, we know that after the honeymoon wears off, they'll still drag all their crap out to the living room and leave it all over the place, but for a few hours I can rest on my substantial laurels. Behold...


Which then, in turn, allows the living room and dining room to look respectable...


Okay. Time to stop patting myself on the back, because the playroom was like a pre-season game compared to what I face now...The abomination that is our basement has already been made public, and it is only worse now.

Mrs. Furious has more: before, during and after.

UPDATE: Kid Furious and Baby spent almost the whole day actualy playing in the playroom today. They can find their stuff, use it in the room, and even put it away! I feel like I cured polio last night! Once I plugged in her CD player, Kid sat in the egg chair and listened to Disney CDs for for hours...

Movie Résumé: The List

( ) Rocky Horror Picture Show
( ) Grease
( ) Pirates of the Caribbean
( ) Pirates of the Caribbean 2: Dead Man's Chest
( ) Boondock Saints
(x) Fight Club
( ) Starsky and Hutch
( ) Neverending Story
(x) Blazing Saddles
( ) Universal Soldier
( ) Lemony Snicket: A Series Of Unfortunate Events
(x) Along Came Polly
( ) Joe Dirt
(x) King Kong
( ) A Cinderella Story
( ) The Terminal
( ) The Lizzie McGuire Movie
( ) Passport to Paris
( ) Dumb & Dumber
( ) Dumber & Dumberer
( ) Final Destination
( ) Final Destination 2
( ) Final Destination 3
(x) Halloween
(x) The Ring
( ) The Ring 2
( ) Surviving Christmas
(x) Flubber (orignal only)
( ) Harold & Kumar Go To White Castle
( ) Practical Magic
( ) Chicago
( ) Ghost Ship
( ) From Hell
( ) Hellboy
( ) Secret Window
(x) I Am Sam
(x) The Whole Nine Yards
( ) The Whole Ten Yards
( ) The Day After Tomorrow
(x) Child's Play
( ) Seed of Chucky
( ) Bride of Chucky
( ) Ten Things I Hate About You
( ) Just Married
( ) Gothika
(x) Nightmare on Elm Street
(x) Sixteen Candles
( ) Remember the Titans
( ) Coach Carter
( ) The Grudge
( ) The Grudge 2
(x) The Mask
( ) Son Of The Mask
(x) Bad Boys
( ) Bad Boys 2
( ) Joy Ride
( ) Lucky Number Sleven
(x) Ocean's Eleven
( ) Ocean's Twelve
(x) Bourne Identity
( ) Bourne Supremacy
(x) Lone Star
( ) Bedazzled (original only)
(x) Predator I
(x) Predator II
(x) The Fog
(x) Ice Age
( ) Ice Age 2: The Meltdown
(x) Curious George
(x) Independence Day
(x) Cujo
(x) A Bronx Tale
( ) Darkness Falls
(x) Christine
(x) ET
( ) Children of the Corn
( ) My Bosses Daughter
( ) Maid in Manhattan
( ) War of the Worlds
( ) Rush Hour
( ) Rush Hour 2
( ) Best Bet
( ) How to Lose a Guy in 10 Days
(x) She's All That
( ) Calendar Girls
( ) Sideways
( ) Mars Attacks
(x) Event Horizon
( ) Ever After
(x) Wizard of Oz
(x) Forrest Gump
( ) Big Trouble in Little China
(x) The Terminator
(x) The Terminator 2
(x) The Terminator 3
(x) X-Men
(x) X2
(x) X-3
( ) Spider-Man
( ) Spider-Man 2
( ) Sky High
( ) Jeepers Creepers
( ) Jeepers Creepers 2
( ) Catch Me If You Can
(x) The Little Mermaid
(x) Freaky Friday (original only)
( ) Reign of Fire
(x) The Skulls
(x) Cruel Intentions
( ) Cruel Intentions 2
( ) The Hot Chick
(x) Shrek
( ) Shrek 2
( ) Swimfan
(x) Miracle on 34th street
(x) Old School
(x) The Notebook
( ) K-Pax
( ) Kippendorf's Tribe
(x) A Walk to Remember
( ) Ice Castles
( ) Boogeyman
(x) The 40-year-old-virgin
(x) Lord of the Rings Fellowship of the Ring
(x) Lord of the Rings The Two Towers
(x) Lord of the Rings Return Of the King
(x) Indiana Jones and the Raiders of the Lost Ark
(x) Indiana Jones and the Temple of Doom
(x) Indiana Jones and the Last Crusade
( ) Baseketball
( ) Hostel
(x) Waiting for Guffman
( ) House of 1000 Corpses
( ) Devils Rejects
( ) Elf
(x) Highlander
(x) Mothman Prophecies
(x) American History X
( ) Three
( ) The Jacket
( ) Kung Fu Hustle
( ) Shaolin Soccer
( ) Night Watch
( ) Monsters Inc.
(x) Titanic
(x) Monty Python and the Holy Grail
( ) Shaun Of the Dead
( ) Willard
( ) High Tension
( ) Club Dread
( ) Hulk
(x) Dawn of the Dead
( ) Hook
(x) Chronicle Of Narnia
( ) 28 days later
( ) Orgazmo
(x) Phantasm
( ) Waterworld
(x) Kill Bill vol 1
( ) Kill Bill vol 2
( ) Mortal Kombat
( ) Wolf Creek
( ) Kingdom of Heaven
( ) the Hills Have Eyes
( ) I Spit on Your Grave aka the Day of the Woman
( ) The Last House on the Left
(x) Re-Animator
(x) Army of Darkness
(x) Star Wars Ep. I The Phantom Menace
( ) Star Wars Ep. II Attack of the Clones
( ) Star Wars Ep. III Revenge of the Sith
(x) Star Wars Ep. IV A New Hope
(x) Star Wars Ep. V The Empire Strikes Back
(x) Star Wars Ep. VI Return of the Jedi
( ) Ewoks Caravan Of Courage
( ) Ewoks The Battle For Endor
(x) The Matrix
( ) The Matrix Reloaded
( ) The Matrix Revolutions
( ) Animatrix
(x) Evil Dead
( ) Evil Dead 2
( ) Team America: World Police
(x) Red Dragon
(x) Silence of the Lambs
( ) Hannibal
( ) Battle Royale
( ) Battle Royale 2
(x) Brazil
(x) Contact
( ) Cube
(x) Dr. Strangelove
( ) Enlightenment Guaranteed
(x) Four Rooms
(x) Memento
( ) Pi
( ) Requiem for a Dream
(x) Pulp Fiction
(x) Reservoir Dogs
(x) Run Lola Run
( ) Russian Ark
(x) Serenity
(x) Sin City
(x) Snatch
( ) Spider
(x) The Sixth Sense
(x) The Village
( ) Waking Life
( ) Zatoichi
( ) Ikiru
( ) The Seven Samurai
( ) Brick
(x) Akira

Mitt-staken

In Mitt Romney's Gettysburg Address for Jesus he evoked a memory designed to make him seem not quite like all the other white, millionaire Republicans... “I saw my father march with Martin Luther King.”

What a swell, inclusive, socially-aware guy. Whatever. That line did little to impress me at the time, because a college-age Mitt Romney was certainly old enough to march with King alongside his father if it meant anything to him.

Or, maybe he couldn't. Because it never happened.

That might be the case... Historians in Michigan can find no evidence of Governor (at the time) George Romney attending or marching in a MLK event. Notorious old fool David Broder seems to have conflated different events and linked the two in a book he wrote—perhaps that's were Mitt got his "memory."

If events transpired as Romney and Broder claim, at least Mitt has a good excuse why he missed out on King himself—he was spending 30 months abroad on his Morman mission and would never have "seen" his father or Martin Luther King do anything.

By all accounts George Romney was an active leader on civil rights at the time, and did attend marches, just not with King. And while young Mitt may well have been impressed, even influenced, by his father's activism, Presidential Candidate Mitt, in his self-defining speech, drew upon a memory that exists only in his imagination.

Joe Biden and Al Gore were ridiculed for far less. What will happen to Mitt? Let me know if you see this story dominating any headlines. I won't be holding my breath.

Vice President Catches Up On Some "Filing"

Photo: (AFP/Jim Watson)

Sounds convenient.

BREAKING: Limited Time Engagement

Here is the first six minutes of an eagerly anticipated project involving guys who wear masks...and makeup.

The quality of the clip is atrocious, but the content looks freaking awesome. They have the right people carrying this franchise now.

This won't be up long, so check it out. (Of course, rather than a true bootleg, this could be part of a viral ad campaign)...

UPDATE: New trailer in theaters and online here. Holy. Fucking. Shit.

UPDATE 2: Warner Bros. already had the first video yanked off YouTube. It was a handheld bootleg of a monitor playing the first six minutes of the upcoming Batman movie "The Dark Knight." A bank robbery scene inroducing the Joker. Awesome. Heath Ledger should clear space for his Oscar now. Following up with all the players from "Batman Begins" plus a powerhouse performance from Ledger makes this a lock for best comic movie ever.

The Joker won't be dancing to any Prince songs in this film. I cannot wait.

UPDATE 3: It's back up here.

File Under "Bat-Boy"

I hesitate to even give this Drudge/Enquirer story legs or a link, but I feel like I should point out that I think it is total and complete crap. Any evidence tying this to another campaign would finish them in my book. Even Obama.

While Exploring the Amazon...

Saw this while shopping online:

3 of 8 people found the following review helpful:

More junk made in China December 6, 2007
By "Melissa L" (MI United States) - See all my reviews
I bought this at Sam's Club and brought it home. It's a piece of junk - and yes, it's made in China. It is supposed to have 3 settings but the high setting doesn't work. On medium, it's hot in some spots and cold in others. It's obviously going right back in the box and back to Sam's Club.

Don't waste your money! WHEN will we have a decent choice of products NOT made in China???

Um, when you stop shopping at fucking Sam's Club, you cheap moron.

The Lion Roars

Sen. Edward Kennedy, during the FISA filibuster...

The President has said that American lives will be sacrificed if Congress does not change FISA. But he has also said that he will veto any FISA bill that does not grant retro-active immunity. No immunity, no FISA bill. So if we take the President at his word, he's willing to let Americans die to protect the phone companies.

Goddamn right, Teddy. Nicely done.

Fantastic job tonite by Chris Dodd who has been promising he would stop any FISA bill with telecom immunity, and led he charge. More on this later...
[h/t: Kos]

UPDATE: C&L has the video (and a transcript)...

Zing!

The Furious Rules — No. 436:

The "Word of the Year" needs to actually be a fucking word.

Merriam-Webster, this is bullshit.

SPRINGFIELD, Mass. - Expect cheers among hardcore online game enthusiasts when they learn Merriam-Webster's Word of the Year. Or, more accurately, expect them to "w00t."

"W00t," a hybrid of letters and numbers used by gamers as an exclamation of happiness, topped all other terms in the Springfield dictionary publisher's online poll for the word that best sums up 2007.

Merriam-Webster's president, John Morse, said "w00t" was an ideal choice because it blends whimsy and new technology.

I say it's crap because it blends number and letters with incalculable dorkiness. "Hardcore online game enthusiasts" should expect kidney-punches if they "w00t" around Mr. Furious.

Holy Bullshit

Stupidest. Fucking. Legislation. Ever.

Your Congress (not) at work. Read it and weep.

UPDATE: Congress passes stupid resolutions all the time (Freedom Fries, anyone?) and apparently this one was a spiteful response to an earlier resolution offering "respect to Ramadan and the Muslim faith" put forth in October, and this resolution's sponsor Rep. Steve King [R-IA] admitted as much. For spite. Mighty "Christian" of him. At least one could argue that the Muslim one had useful p.r. benefits abroad, and was in response to some ill will and persecution...but still, fucking stupid and not appropriate.

UPDATE 2: King's measure passes overwhelmingly 372-9 [results], with 10 protesting "Present" votes and 40 not voting. Interestingly Dems "Yeas" outnumbered Republicans 195-177. Jackasses all. My Congressman (Old Man Dingell) voted "Yea."

Judge Sentences Vick to 14 Years*

"Well, that's 23 months to you and me..."

The judge was none to happy too hear that Vick been less than candid in his testimony, and felt Vick had failed to accept responsibilty for his actions. Vick's plea called for 12-18 months. The judge said, "Fuck that. Try your comeback in 2010!" and gave him 23 months—the harshest term of all the defendants. He cannot appeal.

Vick also gets three years probation and must serve at least 85% of his sentence—19-1/2 months.

I hope the guards toss his cell with a hungry German Shepherd on a daily basis. Fucking punk.

* Dog years

UPDATE: This little escapade has cost Vick an estimated $142 million. You know what I say to that...

Reading Assignment

No, not my laborious Mitt Romney post below—though I would appreciate if you read it—please go and check out Kos contributor Devilstower's post, not on Romney, but on JFK, our current religious/political hypocrisy, and the greater pathetic strategies on all sides. It's the best thing I've read in along time.

'With God On Our Side'

It's too good to snip, just go read the whole thing.

WTF, Sven?

So I've been aware that my '01 Volvo S60 doesn't exactly get the mileage I'd hoped when I bought it. Fuel efficiency was not at the top of the list when I made the purchase either...I had a limited budget, a short commute, and we were expecting a second child, so maximum airbaggage and safety came first—the fact that this car was really nice and I got a fantastic deal, cinched it...

Back to the mileage...First of all the tank on this car is huge. Twenty-one fucking gallons! (UPDATE: 18.5 gal.) So, with gas jumping up and down a quarter every other week, I never like to fill the car all the way up for fear of wasting five bucks if the price drops. This makes it difficult for me to keep an accurate count on the amount of gas I use. Couple that with the fact that I rode my bike to work frequently this past summer/fall, it was often weeks between trips to the gas station.

So here's my issue with this car. When I fill the car up, I try to remember to hit the old trip odometer back to 0.0 in hopes that I can figure the mileage next time I top it off (this never works because I never fill it all the way back up). But it often seems like I can go pretty far on the first quarter tank or so, and I think, "Hmm, twenty gallon tank, I've gone a hundred miles and it's still over three quarters full...not terrible." The next thing I know, I'm under a quarter tank and I've only gone another hundred miles...

What the fuck is up with that?

Last night I filled the car all the way up. It swallowed 14.595 gallons. The trip odometer read 206. That's an astoundingly Hummeresque 14.1 mpg. Now, that's in-town driving, including some early morning warm-up time, but still...that's awful. I had to drive up to Mrs F's grandmother's house and back that evening. Before getting home, I made sure to fill up again. 96 miles, 3.746 gallons...that's 26 mpg. Primarily highway driving, but an aggressive 75-80 mph. Not bad. but, that's a pretty wide split between city and highway. Or is the difference the first-part-of-the-tank factor?...Anybody else experience anything like this?

I'll be keeping closer track of this and following up. Because I know how fascinating this must be to all of you. Consider this an open thread to share what you current car is and what your mileage is, if you know.

"You're No Jack Kennedy."

UPDATE: It took two days to finish, but I finally got it all out...complete with videos and links!


First things first. Mitt Romney's speech does not "shake me to my core", "offend me" or anything else. Why? Because I could give a fuck what he, his fellow Mormons, or the Evangelical religionists he was bonding with think about me or anyone else on the outs with the church. They can all kiss my ass.

What pisses me off is the impact all of this plays in politics and even more, the treatment Romney is getting for making this speech—before, during, and especially after. Comparisons to Kennedy's speech are a natural storyline for the somnambulant media—and fully intended by Romney and his handlers, evident by his choice of location, words, and even posing for photos (see above). But that comparison could not be more misrepresentative of the two speeches and what they really meant.

Widely hyped as the next great Kennedyesque political speech of our time, Romney's ‘Faith in America’ Address was given all the coverage and trappings of the fucking State of the Union for chrissakes. His choice of venue (George H.W. Bush's Presidential Library) even allows him to make it from behind the Seal of the President of the United States.

It was treated as a courageous act that Romney confront this "issue." A "risky move that might backfire" on him. I suppose it would have been if he actually mentioned the word "Morman" more than once, or confronted his accusers. Instead, it was not a defense of Mormanism, nor a reminder that religion should hold no place in politics—it was a straight-up Evangelical asskissfest, complete with all the codewords and targetting of a strawman common enemy. It should have taken place at Liberty University and been shown on the 700 Club, not given all-day, top-story coverage everywhere from CNN to NPR.

While both Kennedy and Romney faced similar questions about their faith from a close-minded, religionist minority of the the country, what they did about it couldn't be more different: Kennedy strode into the lion's den and told them what was what. By contrast, Romney slithered in and tried to wedge himself into the pew with the very people who publicly doubt his qualifications and question the validity of his faith.

Baby F is waking up. Gotta run. More to come.

I'm back. Where was I? Oh yeah, blowing the bullshit that this was akin to Kennedy's speech out of the water...

Here's Kennedy's speech boiled down:

Yeah, I'm Catholic. What of it? That's between me and my God and none of your fucking business and has nothing to do with being President, got it? And howdya like these apples?...The separation of church and state is absolute. And I mean fucking worlds apart with a goddamn asteroid belt between them. The government giving nothing to any church or religious school, and taking no direction back. If you don't like it...fuck the hell off.

Don't believe me? Watch it for yourself. The only difference between my paraphrasing and what Kennedy says is my lack of Boston accent, and his lack of expletives (though, I think he does mumble "motherfuckers" at the end there, you just don't hear it due to poor audio quality...).



You can read the entire speech here. It's worth reading simply as a contrast to the politics of today.

In stark contrast, here is Romney:

I believe that Jesus Christ is the Son of God and the Savior of mankind, and I love him as much as you! The founding fathers did too! This country is all about religion, and without it, we're nothing. God save us from the marauding secularists who seek to destroy us and what we love. And don't forget those crazy Moslems! They'll cut your throat while praising Allah...Forget about that Morman stuff, I'm just like you! Did I mention I love Jesus as much as you? Good. Will (God) you (Jesus) vote (Creator) for (Liberty) me (religion) now (prayer)?

Erase all the codewords and boil it down, and that's really all it was. A big "Can't we religious folks put aside our teeny, tiny differences and fend off those godless athiests?"

If you won't vote for Obama because he's black, you are a racist. If you won't vote for Hillary because she's a woman, you're sexist. And if you won't vote for Mitt Romney because he's Morman, it's the same fucking thing, there just really isn't a word for it. But rather than confront this, Romney panders to it. He tries to assure these religious bigots to be comfortable with him because he's just like them.

He's not calling for religious tolerance. He's asking Evangelicals to be tolerant of him so they can all get together and be intolerant of the non-religious. Hence stoking the old "creeping secularism" common enemy.

Romney takes the basic framework of JFK's speech—a list of problems faced by the nation, a claim of independence from influence, and that he is running on the issues only—but he fills all the gaps with bullshit. Romney throws in a passing reference to a "separation of church and state"—but then immediately undermines it.

Here's Kennedy:

"I believe in an America where the separation of church and state is absolute--where no Catholic prelate would tell the President (should he be Catholic) how to act, and no Protestant minister would tell his parishoners for whom to vote--where no church or church school is granted any public funds or political preference--and where no man is denied public office merely because his religion differs from the President who might appoint him or the people who might elect him...

...Finally, I believe in an America where religious intolerance will someday end--where all men and all churches are treated as equal--where every man has the same right to attend or not attend the church of his choice." [emphasis mine]

Now, in defense of Romney, he's really just saying what he needs to, in order to out-God the guy who just blew by him in the standings (ordained minister Hucksterbee) in a last-ditch lunge at the GOP nomination before the primaries kick off. He's not really talking to anybody BUT the worst element of the electorate. In fact, if he actually tried anything close to what JFK said about separating church and state, he'd've been booed off the stage, but he should hardly get credit for doing anything other than pandering. Oh, I guess I'll give him credit for misrepresenting the Founding Fathers, our history as a nation...and the Constitution.

Here's his swipe at keeping church and state separate:

"We separate church and state affairs in this country, and for good reason. No religion should dictate to the state nor should the state interfere with the free practice of religion. But in recent years, the notion of the separation of church and state has been taken by some well beyond its original meaning. They seek to remove from the public domain any acknowledgment of God. Religion is seen as merely a private affair with no place in public life. It is as if they are intent on establishing a new religion in America – the religion of secularism. They are wrong.

Kennedy's whole damn speech is about keeping religion out of state affairs, while the Mittster can't go a breath without taking it back. Oh, and I don't know what the fuck a "religion of secularism" is aside from an oxymoron. Ask Bill O'Reilly...

Some more of Romney's bullshit:

"We should acknowledge the Creator as did the Founders – in ceremony and word. He should remain on our currency, in our pledge, in the teaching of our history, and during the holiday season, nativity scenes and menorahs should be welcome in our public places. Our greatness would not long endure without judges who respect the foundation of faith upon which our Constitution rests. I will take care to separate the affairs of government from any religion, but I will not separate us from 'the God who gave us liberty.'

Pure crap. First, all this "God on the currency and in the Pledge" crap is from the McCarthyite 1950s, not the Founding Fathers. It doesn't belong there, but I know of no serious assault on it. As for the nativity scenes crap, drive down any street and private yards and churches have more than got that covered. For a town to erect one in the public square is unnecessary and crosses Kennedy's (and my) line.

Oh, and last I checked, judges and all other public servants take an oath to uphold the law and the Constitution—nothing else. And certainly not any "faith."

So here's Mitt's big statement. This actually comes very early in the speech:

"Freedom requires religion just as religion requires freedom. Freedom opens the windows of the soul so that man can discover his most profound beliefs and commune with God. Freedom and religion endure together, or perish alone.

The history of mankind all across the globe, begs to differ with that one, asshole. Even now, I know plenty of religious countries I'd hardly call free. And linking the two is the part that pisses me off the most. Here is where he makes clear that being beholden to God somehow makes one "free" (not sure how that makes sense) and that the non-religious don't have a place in Romney's vision of America.

Fuck you, Mitt. The theocratic fantasy country you're talking about isn't the one I live in, or that the Founding Fathers established. If you want to be President of that country, take the bigoted jackasses you're appealing to and start your own. I think there's a plot of land down in Guyana that's perfect.

Links:
Romney's complete speech. Have your airsick (or punching) bag close by.

Christopher Hitchen's obliteration of Romney. Don't miss it. Money quote:

[...] According to the admittedly very contradictory scriptures of the New Testament, Jesus of Nazareth warned his disciples and followers that they should expect to be ridiculed and mocked for their faith. After all, how likely was it that God had decided to reveal himself to only a few illiterate peasants in a barbarous backwater? Those who elected to believe this stuff were quite rightly told to expect a hard time, and the expression "fool for God" or "fool for Christ" has been with us ever since. That concept has some dignity and nobility. Entirely lacking in dignity or nobility (or average integrity) is the well-heeled son of a gold-plated church who wants to assume the pained look of martyrdom only when he is asked if he actually believes what he says. A long time ago, Romney took the decision to be a fool for Joseph Smith, a convicted fraud and serial practitioner of statutory rape who at times made war on the United States and whose cult has been made to amend itself several times in order to be considered American at all. We do not require pious lectures on the American founding from such a man, and we are still waiting for some straight answers from him.

Maureen Dowd with a rare column worth reading... And even David Brooks, while trying to be enthusiastic, sees through Mitt's crap... Mild-mannered Kevin Drum blows a gasket... Toast tees off... Ezra thinks it was terrible, but calls it pure pander, perfectly played... Yglesias exposes Mitt's misrepresentation of Mormanism... and Digby, as usual, is excellent, and icludes several good links.

House Afire

I intended to have a week of light posts about Disney...or music...some baseball hot stove stuff...or a nice "Mr Furious Heartily Endorses" post to work back from vacation and make up for the the fact that the "serious" taser story was above the fold here for like ten days. But this Huckabee story and Mitt Romney's bullshit "faith" speech and his corresponding JFK-ification has me fucking livid.

Once I clear the decks of some work, it is fucking on.

Huckabee "Heartbroken"

WASHINGTON (CNN) -- [link] Republican presidential candidate Mike Huckabee said it was "heartbreaking" that the deaths of women killed by a convicted rapist who was released from prison after Huckabee supported his parole had become politicized.

..."There are families who are truly, understandably and reasonably, grief stricken," Huckabee told CNN. "And for people to now politicize these deaths and to try to make a political case out of it rather than to simply understand that a system failed and that we ought to extend our grief and heartfelt sorrow to these families, I just regret politics is reduced to that."

Yeah, you sound "heartbroken"...that this is an issue. Here's your cup, Mike. Drink it down.



Let's make things clear. This is politicized now because you responded to the mouth-breathing, Clenis-fearing, rightwing asshats when you were Governor and pushed for the release of a convicted rapist for purely political reasons!

In the same breath you claim "not to have pressured" the parole board, you mention that you were considering "granting DuMond clemency in 1996, but he dropped the idea in response to public outcry."

To cover your ass against that "public outcry" and in defiance of the letters you recieved pleading that DuMond remain in prison, you held a controversial closed-door, no-transcript session with the Parole Board, and within weeks he was on the street. What and who are we supposed to believe here? The board members who say you pressured them, and threatened to outright commute DuMond if he wasn't paroled or you and your political handlers. That his parole stipulated he leave Arkansas (convenient for you) but both Florida and Georgia refused to accept him, and he ended up in Missouri? That's how "concerned" you were with his supervsion?

You fucked up, Mike. Big time. And people lost their lives because of it. And it was for a disgraceful reason—political payback. So don't you dare moan about politics now. Right after you're done shutting the fuck up you can rot in Hell right next to your buddy DuMond.

Huckabee Undone?

"Governor Huckabee? Chuck Norris called, he wants his fist back."

Wow. If this shit came down against a Democratic governor, they'd be finished in their pursuit of the White House. The GOP and the media would have a field day with this...

Documents Expose Huckabee's Role In Serial Rapist's Release
December 4, 2007 11:18 PM

Little Rock, Ark -- As governor of Arkansas, Mike Huckabee aggressively pushed for the early release of a convicted rapist despite being warned by numerous women that the convict had sexually assaulted them or their family members, and would likely strike again. The convict went on to rape and murder at least one other woman.

Now, by all accounts, Mike Huckabee seems to be a nice guy. A Republican I could live with. Sure his rejection of evolution makes him intelectually unqualified for office, but he's not the guy I wanted to see hoisted like this. And in general I don't necessarily like holding governors accountable for the actions of more or less anonymous, unrelated criminals...

But this one is a bit different that the classic examples of the past (ie: Dukakis).

First, there was little question about this guy's danger to the public. He was a serial rapist, and had even been involved in a prior murder. Huckabee's office had been warned repeatedly by the victims of this rapist, Wayne Dumond, that he would not leave witnesses next time.

He didn't. Twice.

That's bad enough, but what makes it worse is that Huckabee is actively lying about the course of events now, and his staff has engaged in covering up his involvement and knowledge for years.

But the kicker? It all comes down to the Clintons. Yes, that's right. Back in the nineties the GOP was so fucking obsessed with Bill Clinton, that when one of his distant relatives, a 17 year old girl, was raped at knifepoint by Dumond the right wing machine leapt into action:

In 1996, as a newly elected governor who had received strong support from the Christian right, Huckabee was under intense pressure from conservative activists to pardon Dumond or commute his sentence. The activists claimed that Dumond's initial imprisonment and various other travails were due to the fact that Ashley Stevens, the high school cheerleader he had raped, was a distant cousin of Bill Clinton, and the daughter of a major Clinton campaign contributor.

And Huckabee complied. Fucking disgraceful. Huckabee recieved written pleas from several victims including a woman who was raped with her three year old daughter in the bed. Need more? He also recieved a letter from the since-grown daughter.

Dumond got a chance to rape and kill at least two other women before being re-apprehended in Missouri. All because along the way he accidentallly dragged the Clintons into it.

UPDATE: More from Kos and Carpetbagger, but nowhere in the mainstream...

SECOND UPDATE: Via Andrew Sullivan, Huckabee addresses the Dumond situation. Sullivan finds it candid, even compelling. I don't. Especially considering the active role he and his staff took trying to suppress the truth by hiding the letters in his archives beyond the reach of FOIA, and because he cannot even express his regret without blaming Bill Clinton:

"It was a horrible situation, horrible, I feel awful about it in every way. I wish that there was some way I could go back and reverse the clock and put him back in prison. But nobody, not me, not Jim Guy Tucker, not Bill Clinton, not that parole board, could ever imagine what might have transpired."

"Nobody could imagine...?" I'm sick to death of that excuse from Republicans, aren't you? You didn't have to imagine. It was in writing. On your desk. Sent to you by the parole board. And you chose to ignore it, act on Dumond's behalf, and push for his release anyway. Shut the fuck up.

I'm Back

As if anybody noticed I was gone...

The Family Furious just returned from a week at Disney World, and blogging will resume as soon as I am able. Like, when I get to work tomorrow! LOL!

Seriously? Any time I go away, the freelance work piles up, so I hope to get back in the swing as soon as I can. Lots of stuff to comment on, rail on, recommend, etc...