Tuesday, July 10, 2007


Look, I'm as big an Apple fan* as anyone, but I was just astounded at the display last week of jackasses camping out on the street to get in line for an overpriced, oversized phone/iPod. People scalped their spots in line for thousands of dollars!

I'm sure it's slick and pretty—all Apple products are—but come on, people, get a fucking life. It's a phone!

Anyway, at Christmastime the jokes on all of those asshats that overpaid for the oversized first-gen iPhone, when Apple unveils the newer, smaller, cheaper nano-based iPhone...
NEW YORK - Apple Inc. plans to launch a cheaper version of the iPhone in the fourth quarter that could be based on the ultra-slim iPod Nano music player, according to a JP Morgan report.

Kevin Chang, a JP Morgan analyst based in Taiwan, cited people in the supply channel he did not name and an application with the U.S Patent and Trademark office for his report dated July 8.

Apple filed a patent application document dated July 5 that refers to a multifunctional handheld device with a circular touch pad control, similar to the Nano's scroll wheel.

Apple spokeswoman Natalie Kerris declined comment.

Don't these nerds know that it never pays to buy the first version of something? Especially with Apple? Jobs always has something else up his sleeve.

Here's a funny bit from The Daiily show on the iPhone...

UPDATE: But, will it blend?

* Full disclosure: Pretending I haven't had two Apple products utterly fail and screw me over the last five weeks...AND, I just gave Apple another two grand to replace my wife's laptop and get myself a new display. For the G5 that's still in the shop.


Toast said...

I love my iPod, and you know why? Because there was nothing else like it. Nothing else that came close to doing the same job.

But a cell phone? I don't get it. Maybe it's just that I've never felt terribly compelled to browse the internet or do email from a phone. Sure, I get baseball scores now and then when I'm on the run, but that's it.

There was a quote from Jobs in the latest Newsweek where he says "Most people HATE their cell phones." And was like, really? They do? I was completely unaware of this.

Mr Furious said...

I hate mine. Motorola piece of shit. It is high on my list of things to replace in my life. The sound is horrible, the reception sucks. My wife's "free" Samsung serves her much better on the same T-Mobile network in the same town that mine regularly fails me.

I bitch about it constantly, and she dismisses me as the crank that I am, but she had to take mine with her the other day when hers was dead, and she called me, could barely hear me, and exclaimed, "This is how your phone is? How do you use this thing? I can barely hear you!"

"Yup! It's a hunk of crap. I told you."

I just want dependable tools. nothing else in the world frustrates me more than inconsistant performance. Makes me want to freak out and smash things. I remember giving an old CD player the "Office Space" copier treatment once upon a time, and I cannot wait to toss this phone in the path of a steamroller.

Another frustrating aspect to the whole cell phone issue is the lack of good, objective analysis. I'm a guy that loves a good Consumer Reports rating, but I cannot find anything that compares different models of phones.

I want my phone to ring when someone calls me, and to have a signal when I need one. That's it. Cameras, internet, text, mp3s—all that shit can go out the window. I want to walk into the store and say "I just want the best actual phone for reception. Which one is that?" They can NEVER answer that question. Ever.

Mr Furious said...

Addendum: Which is part of my problem with the iPhone. Apple locked into a 5-year deal with AT&T, widely acknowledged to have the worst network of the big companies. So you have the fancy ass, expensive thing that will fail you as a phone. At least it will look good doing it, and you can listen to some tunes 'til you get back in range.