Back From the Grave...

...and not quite ready to party.

Bringing everybody up to speed...I am now relocated to Michigan sans the rest of the Family Furious. Mrs F and the Kids are remaining in N.C. to finish out the school year and hopefully sell the house in a timely manner. While one might have expected my "free" evenings to allow for massive quantities of blogging, it hasn't quite worked out the way.

My arrival here was hectic: for the first two weeks I was adjusting to a new job in the day, while helping my old job complete projects in progress in the evening. Then, last week Mrs F and the girls came to visit, and I wasn't going to waste any of their limited time here on the computer.

Oh, and my new job (and seating location) eliminates any blogging and surfing during the day.

Next thing you know it’s been nearly a month and I've barely blogged at all. The surprise, to me, has been how little I miss it. I've amped up the Facebook a bit, but that's not really a substitute for reading, writing or commenting on a normal blog. I just haven’t felt compelled to post about much of late.

So here’s what I expect going forward...

Things will probably be more sporadic, and when I DO post, it’ll be more stuff about the cars I’m driving and photographing...I’ll probably pull an Atrios and rely on posting links and quotes a bit more...embed video if we’re lucky. And if something really pisses me off, maybe it’ll result in a long-format tirade like the good ole days.

Sticking with the automotive theme...

PHOTOSHOP FAIL
“Who were the ad wizards that came up with THIS one?”

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BATTERIES INCLUDED
Ass-kicking Canadian Nissan Sentra ad. (NOTE: Blogger is cropping like a third of the picture off, so you might want to click through to YouTube.)

[h/t Jalopnik. Also, making-of video here]

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RECENT SHOOT:

More here.

My Cubist Period

Behold the Nissan Cube.

I joked to my former coworkers that the new guy doesn't get the BMW, and that "I'm sure I'll be driving the Nissan Cube..."

Lo and behold, those were the keys dropped on my desk. It might be the most ridiculous car since the VW Thing, but it's already grown on me.

Update

As any of you who also follow Mrs Furious' blog already know, things are crazy and about to get crazier. I have accepted a job back in Ann Arbor, MI. I leave in 10 days while Mrs F and the kids stay behind to sell the house and finish school (whichever comes first).

So that has meant (and will mean) a flurry blizzard of activity around the house; finishing projects, cleaning, packing, repeatedly shitting our pants, and then cleaning our pants. At work I have a million loose ends to tie up, and once I leave I will be settling into a new job, trying to finish some ongoing work from my current job all while living with Mrs F's grandmother—which could be serious sitcom material in itself.

Needless to say, blogging is likely to fall by the wayside for a while. Even now I have several things flying around that I'd love to touch on, but don't really have time. Maybe I'll throw together a Link Bonanza or something.

That's all for now.

Ignorance Is Bliss. Or, Is It?

Mrs. F. is currently reading The Geography of Bliss: One Grump's Search for the Happiest Places in the World. It's a non-fiction book written by an NPR foreign correspondent that explores the origins of happiness and where it is found.

She just read aloud a passage that was interesting—and both surprising and predictible at once...

[p. 14] Extroverts are happier than introverts: optimists are happier than pessimists; married people are happier than singles, thought people with children are no happier than singles; Republicans are happier than Democrats; people who attend religious services are happier than those who do not; people with college degreesa re happier than those without, though people with advanced degrees are less happy than those with just a BA; people with and active sex life are happier than those without; women and men are equally happy, though women have a wider emotional range; having an affair will make you happy, but will not compensate for the massive loss of happiness you will incur when your spouse finds out and leaves you; people are least happy when they're commuting to work; busy people are happier than those with little to do; wealthy people are happier than poor ones, but only slightly.

Discuss...

Gone Fishin'

The Family Furious is off the grid for the week. Back on the 30th.

Bomb Squad

Kid's sick with a stomach bug, and while putting her to bed at 8:30 p.m., I fell asleep without having done my nightly task of doing the dishes and cleaning up the kitchen.

Doing that and loading the dishwasher at 2 a.m. without waking anyone (Mrs F) up is akin to successfully diffusing a bomb on horseback.

I can't believe I did it, and that success saved me from The Wrath of Mom now (for waking her or Baby) and/or in the morning (greeted by a sink and counter littered with dirty dishes).

Veterans Day...NSFW*

DOGS:



KIDS:



I can't even fathom the feeling of being in a combat zome overseas, but as a father with two little kids I can absolutely understand there is no greater sacrifice than being away from your kids for 14 months. None.

*NSFW unless crying at your desk is normal

[h/t Cole]

A bit dusty in here...

A nice story about Jim Rice I forgot about...



Welcome to the Hall, Mr. Rice.

UPDATE: ESPN sucks, as the video became unavailable after a day or so. It was the story of Rice leaping into the stands to help a child struck by a line drive. He saved the kid's life, and watching Rice, the boy's father and the now-grown child talk about it now was pretty moving.

Happy Father's Day. To Me.

It's now been (more or less) a year since we moved to Asheville and much like when I lived in New York City and never went to, say, the Statue of Liberty—we live mere minutes from several access points to the famed Blue Ridge Parkway, yet never use it. When I first toured the area last year when interviewing for my job, I took the Parkway back to the airport, and saw I families piling out of the car to enjoy the many trails and figured we'd be doing the same thing if we moved here. Um, notsomuch.

Anyway, I've been working on my photography of late, and decided I need to get up early and grab some sunrise pictures in the mountains. I've tried to get up, but could never rally, and get my ass out of bed.

I knew I'd have some more opportunity in July when Mrs F and the kids are away, but when I read that the Rhododendron are in peak bloom NOW, I figured I'd use the Father's Day Trump Card to take off in the morning and hit the road—with any luck I'd be home before anyone else was up. I set the alarm for 5:45, but Baby set hers for 5:10—I was good and awake now. Once Mrs F got her back to sleep, I made my escape. The weather was less than ideal, but around here ten miles one way or the other can be whole different scene (more on that later).

It's a slow and steady climb from Asheville's 2,300 foot elevation up to the Ridge. My first stop was at about 3400 feet, I'd missed sunrise, but it was pretty overcast so it didn't really matter. I had the the dog with me, the windows down and was really enjoying the drive. A little way further up, there was some okay visability, so I snapped off a few shots (the panorama upthread), but it was beginning to feel like the photo part of the trip was a bust, and this was turning into merely a scouting trip for a return with the family.

As I got up into the 5,000s and Craggy Gardens and the visibility was anywhere between a few miles and 30 feet. I shot some Rhododendron, and decided not to go any further ( I had hoped to make it to Mt. Mitchell). When I got back in the car, I took my first real look at the dash and about crapped my pants—the gas gauge was below empty.



For those not familiar with the Parkway, it can be miles between exits (30 or more) and even then, it's not like an Interstate with an Exxon at every ramp. It was 7:00 a.m., I was in the middle of nowhere, and the last thing I wanted to do was call Mrs F to come get me.

I could swear I had a quarter-tank when I left, and that should have been plenty, but I must have misjudged the gauge and then the long climb took its toll on fuel efficiency.

I then realized, "It's all downhill!"

I pulled out and began my descent. Cruising down the mountain in nuetral at a low idle, I decided I better kill the engine until I need it. It cost me the power brakes, but the slope, curves and banks made controlling the car a breeze. It was pretty fun actually...

My silent running had a completely unexpected advantage—the rabbits, wild turkeys, etc that had run for cover on the way up were all along the side of the road. Kinda cool. And then...along the bank I saw what I never dreamed I'd see...




I have a serious thing for bears. I love em. Everything about em. If there was Bear Week on Discovery Channel, you'd know where to find me. I have never seen a bear in the wild. Ever. My parents have a roll of film of a full-grown black bear in the yard at my childhood home—taken twenty years after I left for college. I've waited my whole life, and there it was: right at the side of the road. I coasted silently up, and stopped not twenty feet away.

Clearly a juvenile, I was more worried about the dog spotting him and barking before I could grab my camera. I still had my wide angle 17-35mm lens mounted, so he looks even further than he was, and it was set for my manual exposures in the fog at the top, so the photos are disappointingly blown out, and through the window glass (it was freezing at the top), but I managed to squeeze off six clean shots before he noticed me and took off.

I was positively giddy. I didn't care about the gas anymore, no matter what happened, this trip was a success.

I successfully conserved my fuel and made to a gas station at the bottom and returned home where everyone was asleep and there was no one to share in my glee. I climbed into the only available bed—Baby's toddler bed, and crashed.

Kid and Mrs F greeted me with iced coffee and donuts an hour or two later and at last I could show off my trophy.

All and all, a fantastic morning. I was ready to take the rest of the clan up there for a picnic when it cleared up in the afternoon. Or so I thought...

[to be cont'd.]

Greenville, S.C., May 13, 2009, 5:30 p.m. EST

I saw Grampa Simpson at Whole Foods.

I had a full cart of groceries, so I let this elderly gentleman go ahead of me with his plate of hot buffet food—and his plastic bag of cookies tied to his belt!

Seriously. This guy was buying two cookies from the bakery case, and he tied the bag to his belt. He made sure the cashier saw them and paid for them, then he joined his wife in a booth and sat down to eat.

Five minutes later, as I walked out of the store, the cookies were sitting on the bench next to him, still tied to his belt.

New Years Meme

Via Toast, it's time to take stock of the year that was 2008...

1. What did you do in 2008 that you'd never done before? I'm at a loss here. I think my life has really settled into a routine. A comfortable one.

2. Did you keep your New Year's resolutions, and will you make more for next year? I'm back at the exact same weight—181. So I failed on that one. The goal was 170, and I'm setting sights on that again. Since I fell out of the highest preferred category for life insurance and got bad cholesterol numbers back, I have renewed motivation.

3. Did anyone close to you give birth? My youngest sister had her first child—Mazey.

4. Did anyone close to you die? Nope.

5. What places did you visit? Greenville, SC; Charleston, SC; Asheville, NC; Martha's Vineyard.

6. What would you like to have in 2009 that you lacked in 2008? First: No worries about the health of Kid Furious. Last month marked two years seizure-free, and discontinuing her medication. And in February she had the second and hopefully last procedure on her eyes. Second: Financial security.

7. What dates from 2008 will remain etched upon your memory, and why? Tuesday, November 4 would be the biggest specific "date." But other events include a new job and moving and the medical milestones noted above.

8. What was your biggest achievement(s) of the year? Finally getting that long sought-after new job. I am finally back in my specific area of expertise (magazine art direction) and am totally reinvigorated about my career.

9. What was your biggest failure? Probably letting my weight stagnate and health decline.

10. Did you suffer illness or injury? Nothing beyond #9.

11. What was the best thing you bought? Our house.

12. Whose behavior merited celebration? My kids. Barack Obama. The publisher who hired me.

13. Whose behavior made you appalled and depressed? John McCain, Sarah Palin and just about everyone with an (R) after their name. The media. Bill and Hillary Clinton.

14. Where did most of your money go? Mortgages and realtors.

15. What did you get really, really, really excited about? New job. I really like our new house as well.

16. What song will always remind you of 2008? Anything off "Consolers of the Lonely" and "Signed, Sealed, Delivered" (Obama's theme music).

17. Compared to this time last year, are you:
a) Happier or sadder? Happier.
b) thinner or fatter? +/- a pound.
c) richer or poorer? A wash. New job has a much higher salary, but less benefits and I lost all my freelance work. The income is more secure and steady however. And that means a LOT.

18. What do you wish you'd done more of? Exercise. Sleep. Relax.

19. What do you wish you'd done less of? Eating. Worrying. Procrastinating. And, alas...blogging.

20. How did you spend Christmas this year? In our new home, in my pajamas the whole day with absolutely nowhere to go. It was great.

21. Did you fall in love in 2008? Already fallen...

22. How was work? I think I've covered this by now...I love my new job.

23. What was your favorite TV program? "The Daily Show." I don't really watch any tv regularly.

24. What did you do for your birthday in 2008? Become old.

25. What was the best book you read? "The Miraculous Journey of Edward Tulane" by Kate DeCamillo

26. What was your greatest musical discovery? I won't count the Raconteurs as a "discovery," but I guess these three qualify.

27. What did you want and get? Aren't you sick of hearing about my job yet? Some new camera gear.

28. What did you want and not get? Year-end bonus.

29. What was your favorite film of this year? In the theater: "Iron Man." At home: "No Country For Old Men," perhaps?

30. Did you make some new friends this year? Yes. A new office-full.

31. What one thing would have made your year immeasurably more satisfying? Getting more money for our house in Michigan.

32. How would you describe your personal fashion concept in 2008? Spendthrift. Thirty-fucking-six-inch waist.

33. What kept you sane? Focalin™. Blogging. Photography.

34. Which celebrity/public figure did you fancy the most? Barack Hussein Obama.

35. What political issue stirred you the most? Presidential primary and election.

35a. What political issue stirred you the least? The rats fleeing the sinking Bush Administration? I don't really know.

36. Who did you miss? Friends and family in general. I never went home to CT this year, and missed my opportunity to go Up North, or to New York, etc...

37. Who was the best new person you met? I've met too many people...I'm withholding judgment.

38. Burn any bridges? Yeah...things got kinda rocky with my parents, but it's on the mend.

39. Best new restaurant you went to? 12 Bones (BBQ place here in Asheville).

40. Tell us a valuable life lesson you learned in 2008. It'll sound cheesy, but "keep plugging away." It took a couple years, untold dozens of resumes, and several interviews around the country, but I nailed down a good job back on a magazine.

(here's last year's list for reference. Like you care.)

Life Experience Meme

We all probably need to step away from the politics for a bit. Mrs F got this in an email, and we both purloined it for use as a blog meme.

The stuff that’s true is in BOLD. (I've modified slightly to make this more gender-neutral...)

APPEARANCE:
- I am 5′6 or taller.
- I think I’m ugly.
- I have many scars.
- I tan easily.
- I sunburn easily.
- I have a tattoo.
- I am self-conscious about my appearance. Not excessively, but I think about it. Sometimes.
- I have/I’ve had braces. I did. For years.
- I wear glasses. If I'm awake, they're on.
- I’d get/have gotten plastic surgery if it were 100% safe, free, scar-free.
- I’ve been told I’m attractive by a complete stranger.
- I have had more than 2 piercings.
- I have had piercings in places besides my ears.
- I have freckles.

FAMILY/HOME LIFE:
- I’ve sworn at my parents.
- I’ve run away from home.
- I’ve been kicked out of the house.
- My biological parents are together.
- I have a sibling less than one year old.
- I want to have kids someday.
- I have children. 2 girls.
- I’ve lost a child.

EMBARRASSMENT:
- I’ve slipped out a “LOL” in a spoken conversation.
- Disney movies still make me cry. I cry at the drop of a hat watching movies.
- I’ve snorted while laughing.
- I’ve laughed so hard I’ve cried. All the time.
- I’ve glued my hand to something.
- I’ve laughed till some kind of beverage came out of my nose. Not "till" as in a build-up, but from a sudden burst of laughter while eating or drinking.
- I’ve had my trousers rip in public.

HEALTH:
- I was born with a disease/impairment.
- I‘ve had stitches. Not many.
- I’ve broken a bone. Slipped in the leaves and fell on the curb as a kid. Broke a part of my hip. No cast or treatment required.
- I’ve had my tonsils removed.
- I’ve sat in a doctor’s office with a friend.
- I’ve had my wisdom teeth removed. I'd advise not waiting until you're 39.
- I’ve had serious surgery.
- I’ve had chicken pox.

TRAVELING:
- I’ve driven over 200 miles in one day. That's nothing. I'll do 400-600 miles without a second thought.
- I’ve been on a plane.
- I’ve been to Canada.
- I’ve been to Niagara Falls. As a kid.
- I’ve been to Japan.
- I’ve been to Europe. Paris.
- I’ve been to Africa.

EXPERIENCES:
- I’ve been lost in my city. Here as a newbie. In New York if I went too far out in the boroughs.
- I’ve seen a shooting star.
- I’ve gone out in public in my pajamas. I have a dog...
- I’ve pushed all the buttons in a lift.
- I’ve been to a casino.
- I’ve been skydiving. Photographic proof was just hung up in the house.
- I’ve gone skinny dipping.
- I’ve played spin the bottle.
- I’ve crashed a car. A few.
- I’ve been skiing. A lot.
- I’ve been in a play. Not a fan of public speaking/appearances.
- I’ve met someone in person from the Internet. Other bloggers, no match.com stuff.
- I’ve caught a snowflake on my tongue.
- I’ve seen the Northern Lights.
- I’ve sat on a roof top at night. Often, in Brooklyn.
- I’ve played chicken.
- I’ve seen the Rocky Horror Picture Show.
- I’ve eaten Sushi. No thanks.
- I’ve been snowboarding. Not as successfully as skiing.

RELATIONSHIPS:
- I’m single.
- I’m in a relationship.
- I’m available.
- I’m engaged.
- I’m married.
- I’ve gone on a blind date.
- I have a fear of abandonment.
- I’ve been divorced.
- I’ve had feelings for someone who didn’t have them back.
- I’ve told someone I loved them when I didn’t.
- I’ve told someone I didn’t love them when I did.
- I’ve kept something from a past relationship.

SEXUALITY:
- I’ve had a crush on someone of the same gender.
- I’ve kissed a member of the same gender.
- I’ve had sex with someone of the same gender.
- I’ve had sex with more than one person at the same time.
- I am a cuddler. An incomaptability with Mrs F.
- I’ve been kissed in the rain.
- I’ve had sex outdoors.
- I’ve hugged a stranger.
- I have kissed a stranger.
- I have had sex with a stranger.

HONESTY/CRIME:
- I’ve done something I promised someone else I wouldn’t. I can't think of a specific, but i'm sure I have, do, will...
- I’ve done something I promised myself I wouldn’t. See above.
- I have lied to my parents about where I am.
- I am keeping a secret from the world.
- I’ve cheated while playing a game.
- I’ve cheated on a test.
- I’ve driven through a red light.
- I’ve witnessed a crime.
- I’ve been in a fist fight.
- I’ve been arrested.
- I’ve shoplifted. As a kid.

DRUGS/ALCOHOL
- I’ve consumed alcohol.
- I smoke cigarettes.
- I smoke pot.
- I regularly drink.
- I’ve taken painkillers when I didn’t need them.
- I’ve taken cough medicine when i wasn’t sick.
- I’ve done hard drugs.
- I’ve been addicted to an illegal substance.
- I can’t swallow pills.
- I can swallow about 5 pills at a time no problem.

MENTAL HEALTH:
- I have been diagnosed with depression. Nothing debilitating...
- I shut others out when I’m depressed.
- I take anti-depressants. Helpful...
- I have had an eating disorder.
- I’ve slept an entire day when I didn’t need it.
- I’ve hurt myself on purpose.
- I’m addicted to self harm.
- I’ve woken up crying.

DEATH:
- I’m afraid of dying.
- I hate funerals.
- I’ve seen someone dying.
- I have attempted suicide.
- Someone close to me has attempted suicide.
- Someone close to me has committed suicide.

RANDOM:
- I can sing well.
- I’ve stolen a tray from a fast food restaurant.
- I open up to others too easily.
- I watch the news.
- I don’t kill bugs.
- I hate hearing songs that sacrifice meaning for sake of being able to rhyme.
- I swear regularly. Goddamn right.
- I am a morning person.
- I paid for my mobile phone ring tone.
- I’m a snob about grammar.
- I am a sports fanatic. Less so than before.
- I play with my hair. If rubbing your own bald head counts...
- I have/had “x”s in my screen name.
- I love being neat.
- I love Spam.
- I’ve copied more than 30 CD’s in a day.
- I have fired a gun. Skeet and clay shooting.
- I don’t know how to shoot a gun.
- I am in love with love.
- I am guilty of tYpInG lIkE tHiS.
- I laugh at my own jokes.
- I eat fast food weekly.
- I believe in ghosts.
- I am online 24/7, even as an away message.
- I can’t sleep if there is a spider in the room. Not if it's near me—I'd need to "take care" of it. I have mild arachniphobia.
- I am really ticklish.
- I love white chocolate.
- I bite my nails.
- I play video games.
- I’m good at remembering faces.
- I’m good at remembering names.
- I’m good at remembering dates.
- I have no idea what I want to do for the rest of my life.

Get on it, folks. You know who you are.

Future Product Safety Inspector

Check Mrs. F's site for the combined hilarity and wisdom of Kid Furious...

Slammed

Busy at work, and each night at home brings a home improvement project that eats up my blogging time.

Last night? Cutting and drilling holes all over the house so we can use some of these new appliances. Oh, and spraining the shit out of my wrist when the drill locked up while I was cutting the hole for the dryer vent.

Tonight? Spent down in the basement running black pipe to the kitchen and laundry room for our new (gas) stove and dryer...made extra-fun by having one hand operating at about 50%.

But tomorrow, Mrs F can actually cook dinner. And that's a win for everyone.

High Hopes

I just purchased $150 worth of paint, and I cannot tell you how excited I am to test this stuff out.

I don't fuck around when I paint—I take it seriously. I do a good job (if I say so myself) and I have high expectations. I am a long-time user/believer in Behr™ paint from Home Depot. Over the years I have used and tried them all—Benjamin Moore, Sherwin Williams, Lowes, etc. Behr has most consistently given me the results I want at a reasonable price, and the flexibility afforded by the store hours of Home Depot versus a pro paint shop that closes at 5 is a HUGE factor.

Our new (old) house is in good shape, and the guy we bought if from had pretty good taste, but we are going to need to re-paint every room sooner or later. That's a LOT of paint, and that means a LOT of off-gassing chemicals and such, and I'm not too big on making my kids soak that shit in.

Like everything else these days, there is a movement towards "green" paint products. I've seen print ads for Mythic™ paint and been intrigued...Then, when I went to Lowes and Home Depot over the last week or two, I noticed other paints glomming onto the environmental bandwagon. But I've done my meticulous internet over-research, and I am going all-in with Mythic.

It's more expensive, but not prohibitively so, and I had to drive 15 miles out of town to get it...but I like everything I read about it, I'm a sucker for the retro-styling and good design, and I want to reward a company striving for environmental responsibility.

First on the agenda is the girl's bedroom, then the hallway. I will follow-up with a full review.

UPDATE: Just to be clear—$150 is for a gallon of eggshell enamel for the walls, a gallon of primer, a gallon of ceiling paint, and a quart of semi-gloss for the trim. This paint is NOT $150 a can.

Hello From Asheville!

Well, we did it. The Family Furious has officially cut ties with Ann Arbor with the sale of our house this morning, and by tomorrow night we will be the proud owners of a new (old) bungalow in West Asheville, North Carolina.

It has been an absolutely in-freaking-sane couple weeks, but it will all be back to normal soon,

Hopefully.

Southbound

It's official. The Furious Family is packing up and leaving Michigan. "Hot" Carl Levin and the rest of the fucking morons who screwed up my primary have pushed me over the edge, and a man's gotta do, what a man's gotta do...

Many of you (Deb) already know all about this from Mrs F's blog, but I figured I'd bust it out here, since it's certain to impact the posts here—my long nightmare of a job search came to a close last week with an offer for a gig in Asheville, NC. After some negotiation, I accepted the job on Friday. Now, the nightmare of getting the house ready to sell takes over.

It's a terrific opportunity for me professionally, and Asheville seems to be, by all accounts and my cursory inspection, a fantastic place to live, so I am excited—Mrs F is alternately excited and terrified, and Kid is pissed...So this should be fun.

The logistics of the relocation are kind of overwhelming. The house here in Ann Arbor is nowhere near ready to put on the market, and we don't know exactly how, when or where we are going to settle in Asheville...

So that's the big news. I'm beat, and my wrists are killing me from scraping the house all day to get it ready to paint, so I am hitting the sack.

Oh, for what it's worth, this is the leading contender for the new Casa de Furious...

Slow Not Slow

Things are slow 'round here, because they're not slow anywhere else...Busy at work, busy at home, and most of all busy as hell with a big trial/freelance assignment that has taken all available computer-alone-time, which is when I normally do the blog thing.

Seems like everyone else is slacking on the blogfront too, maybe it's the breaking of spring?

Things'll get back to normal soon enough.

March Meh-ness

For the first time in I can't remember how long, I am not doing an NCAA bracket. I haven't watched a single game all year, and don't have a clue about college hoops this season beyond the fact that Bob Knight* retired.

On the one hand that puts me at the advantage of ignorance enjoyed by receptionists and accounting nerds everywhere who win office pools by picking games by mascots or random chance—but I can't even summon the energy to do anything close to due diligence to fill out a bracket. And I can't rightly enter into a pool with the competitive likes of Toast's Crew or my long-time traditional pool populated by actual ESPN professionals and other sports-obsessed maniacs without making an effort to protect my pride and hard-earned reputation.

Better to lay low...

* an event marked here, but unacknowledged in the comments despite the hilarious video [link]...

UPDATE: Fuck it. I relented. Here's my bracket I got into the pool just in time.

Michelle Obama Might've Fucked Up, But That Doesn't Mean She's Wrong

[NOTE: I am updating this post slightly to include a more complete quote, and tweak my intro and conclusion a bit based on that.]

What we have learned over this year is that hope is making a comeback. It is making a comeback. And let me tell you something -- for the first time in my adult lifetime, I am really proud of my country. And not just because Barack has done well, but because I think people are hungry for change. And I have been desperate to see our country moving in that direction and just not feeling so alone in my frustration and disappointment. I've seen people who are hungry to be unified around some basic common issues, and it's made me proud."

Michelle Obama is taking a beating for making that statement during a rally in Milwaukee yesterday. For the most part, she is getting killed for that one sentence: "...for the first time in my adult lifetime, I am really proud of my country." And in most instances, with a quote omitting the crucial qualifier "really." Even video clips (see below) have a "convenient glitch" that mutes the word "really."

There is no question that statement was risky, loaded and the words perhaps less-than-artfully chosen and delivered, and I suspect Michelle Obama surely wants them back—because they are damaging and counter-productive to her and her husband's cause. But consider most of the critics—I don't think a bunch of male, white pundits can quite identify with the overwhelming emotional feeling associated with a black woman seeing the country on the verge of a historic national mea culpa by nominating a black man for President.

Just sayin...

My initial response to the statement was "Oh shit, she is a loose cannon. That's gonna hurt. Right before the next primary, too..." But just because people aren't ready to hear something, doesn't mean it shouldn't be said. And while it probably could've come at a better time, and been more fleshed out, I think she's right.

I look at myself as countless things—a good father, loyal husband, nice guy, even Red Sox fan—before I think of myself as some hyper-patriotic, pseudo-jingoist definition of a "Proud American."

We fly a flag on front porch—but there have been times in the last seven years when I haven't wanted to. I love my life and the opportunities afforded me, but I don't go around pledging allegiance everyday and contemplating what it means to be "American." I go to work and raise my family and that's about it. Maybe that means I'm taking it for granted, but it's true. And I suspect it's true for most people, you just expect a certain level of lapel-pin-wearing homage from those seeking national office (and those speaking for them).

I am turning forty in May, so "my adult life" matches up pretty well with the 44-year-old Michelle Obama—but only in age. Trying to compare or identify life experience with her or anyone else is just as preposterous for me as it is for any of the countless people sure to be spouting off on this today.

Here's the thing: America as a good actor is supposed to be. The norm. The default. But on more occasions than I can count, it has failed to live up to that promise. In fact, on balance, I'd say there are more things to be ashamed of in "my adult lifetime" than proud of—not just because the things many people hold up as "proud moments" should be fucking expected, but because this country has done a lot of shameful things—here and abroad.

If Barack Obama is elected President, I can honestly say it might be the proudest moment of MY adult life, at least in regard to my feelings about "America."

It's more than the fact that he's black and what that represents—and that's plenty. It's because electing Obama is the strongest possible repudiation of the last twenty years I can imagine, and I think that IS something to be proud of.

And I say twenty years because this is more than the Bush Era—of which there is close to nothing to be proud of. I go back further because there isn't much of a proud legacy from the 90s either. Bill Clinton presided over a nice economic boom, but little else. There was no transformational change. No "New Deal." No progressive movement. No sea change for good.

What was there? There was Rwanda. There was DOMA. There was welfare reform. There was Don't Ask Don't Tell. There was impeachment. There was scandal. Most of all there was complacency and there was greed. The rich got richer and nothing much happened for anybody else. It's more pronounced now, but really, only the faces at the top have changed. It's the only way to explain how we can be where we are today so quickly.

The people in power in the 90s came in, got theirs, and left. And left the pieces in place for the even-more-disgusting shit that happened since.

I can remember the day I came into work after Election Day 2004. Not only had the country endorsed the worst man alive and everything he represented, but here in Michigan, we relegated an entire class of citizens (gays) as second-class. I was fucking embarrassed and ashamed to be an American that day. It was a level of shame that far outweighs all of the proud moments I've seen recited in all the columns today.

The more I type this, the more I identify with what Michelle Obama had the honesty to say...and I've had a pretty good, white bread, middle-class American life with all the trimmings.

It might have been self-centered, it was probably ill-advised, but it was honest. And I'm certainly not going to hold it against her. Not just because she's Barack Obama's black wife, but because maybe it needed to be said.

UPDATE: I just saw a more complete quote [added above], and a video of the remarks here. I'm leaving the truncated quote up top, because I think it still stands on it's own. But when you see the context and delivery, the outrage over this seems even more ridiculous...

UPDATE 2: Apparently the video above is the one flying around most of the blogs and YouTube, and you might notice a slight "glitch" at a key moment...when she says "For the first time I'm [really] proud of my country..."

Here it that key sentence unaltered: